Vomit News
Here's the latest from our news desk...
Teen Convicted of Vomiting on Teacher
A Kansas teenager convicted of intentionally throwing up on a teacher got a unique punishment Tuesday.
For four months, he will be on call to assist Johnson County police agencies anytime someone gets sick in a vehicle. An odious, odorous task, as Spanish teacher David Young well knows.
On May 23, the last day of classes at Olathe Northwest High School, Young was seated when the youth, now 17, walked up to turn in his textbook.
The youth leaned forward toward him and vomited "all over" his body, Young testified Tuesday.
"I was just sort of stunned," he said. The teacher said the student made no effort to turn away or move away.
Two other students testified that the teen had indicated, before and after the incident, that he was acting intentionally.
One girl said that at lunch right before the class, the boy told her: "Pay attention in class today."
Another girl said that the boy previously told her that he intended to throw up on Young on the last day of school. That girl was out of the classroom when the incident occurred, but she testified that she saw the boy in the hall afterward and he said, "You missed it. I did it."
The boy was receiving a failing grade from Young and earlier in the school year had been suspended because of an incident in Young's class, according to testimony. Details of that incident were not discussed.
The boy did not testify at Tuesday's trial in front of Johnson County Magistrate Judge Michael Farley.
The boy's attorney, Brian Costello, argued that the vomiting was nothing more than an "unfortunate accident" brought on by the boy's nervousness over his final exams.
But Farley said that he couldn't ignore his own experiences in assessing the evidence. People who feel they are getting sick try to "minimize the impact," he said.
"He didn't make any effort to turn away," the judge said.
After Farley found the youth guilty, Young told the judge that he considered the boy's actions "an assault upon the dignity of all teachers" and said he hoped to receive a "full confession."
Farley placed the boy on probation for one year with the cleanup requirement. He said the vomit detail would count toward community service.
In addition, the boy must adhere to a 9:30 p.m. curfew on weeknights and 11:30 p.m. on weekends. He also is forbidden from using tobacco, alcohol or drugs and must submit to random testing whenever ordered.
Fossilised vomit found from extinct reptile
British scientists say they have discovered what they believe to be the world's oldest fossilised vomit from a large marine reptile that lived 160 million years ago.
A Professor from the University of Greenwich, says the vomit, found in a clay quarry in northern England, sheds new light on the diet and eating habits of the ichthyosaur - a Jurassic age fish-like reptile with a long head, tapered body, and four flippers.
He says the vomit contains the shells of dozens of belemnites - tiny shellfish that were found in abundance in the water around Britain, which were a staple food for extinct marine reptiles.
While other examples of fossilised vomit have been discovered, the Professor says his sample is the oldest and of a grand scale.
We at The Vomitorium believe that this proves conclusively that beer was invented 161 million years ago!
20 Reasons Why Vomit is Better Than Cafeteria Food
1. After you vomit, you feel better.
2. You can vomit whenever you want.
3. When you vomit, you don't have to wait in line.
4. Vomit is always warm.
5. You don't have to sneak vomit out of the cafeteria.
6. When you're vomiting, a bent spoon is an advantage.
7. You can lose weight vomiting.
8. You don't have to pay to vomit.
9. Vomit is SUPPOSED to look like that.
10. When you vomit, you don't have to come back for seconds.
11. You don't have to vomit everyday.
12. Vomiting can never cause you to eat cafeteria food afterward.
13. You can vomit without a photo ID.
14. Vomit is organic and biodegradable.
15. They don't ration vomit.
16. After you vomit, at least you know what you've eaten.
17. Plastic vomit is funny; plastic cafeteria food is redundant.
18. You don't have to vomit the same thing five days in a row.
19. A dog will eat vomit.
20. After you vomit, at least there's some taste in your mouth.
Warning!!!
Police warn all male clubbers, party-goers and unsuspecting bar regulars to be more alert and cautious when getting a drink offered from a girl. There is a chemical terrorist drug going around called 'beer'. It is generally found in liquid form and is now being used by female sexual predators at parties to convince their male victims to have sex with them.
The shocking statistic is that 'beer' is available virtually anywhere! All girls have to do is persuade a guy to consume a few units of 'beer' and simply ask the guy home for no-strings-attached sex. Men are literally rendered helpless against such attacks. After several 'beers' men will often succumb to desires to perform sex acts on horrific looking women, who they would never normally be attracted to.
Men often awaken after being given 'beer' with only hazy memories of exactly what has happened to them the night before, just a vague feeling that something bad occurred.
At other times these unfortunate men might be stung for their life's worth in a familiar scam know as 'a relationship' - apparently men are easier victims for this scam after 'beer' has been administered and have already been sexually attacked.
Please! Forward this information to every male you know..........
However, if you fall victim to this insidious drug and the predatory women administering it, there are male support groups with venues in every town where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter in an open and frank manner with a bunch of similarly affected like-minded guys. For the nearest support group near you just look up 'Bar' in the Yellow Pages.
If you've got news that you want to share, send it to us here at The Vomitorium.